Welcome to my world of run-on sentences and shameless over use of commas. All posts loosely based on true stories as viewed by a sleep deprived drama queen..........

Monday, November 3, 2008

Fast food and fast hair cuts.......

Must we be in a hurry to do EVERYTHING? Yes, we must. That's why there is a Taco Bell, and a Super Cuts, Fantastic Sam's, insert hair chain name here, on every corner. I predict it won't be long before they have McDonald's franchises actually inside these hair cutting establishments. Men can have a bad burger, and get a bad hair cut at the same time.

A couple of weeks ago we had 12 minutes to spare between music lessons and soccer practice so hubs decided to get a hair cut. He pulled up to one of the above mentioned chains. I knew the idea was not a good one, when I saw a man coming out as we pulled up. He had Lego-head the likes I've never seen. It looked like someone had sculpted his hair from plastic and snapped it right on his head. I was apprehensive to say the least. But not hubs. "Oh, it'll be fine," he said. I decided the girls and I would wait in the car and read. Besides don't these places have some kind of guarantee, 'out in 5 minutes or less or the next one's free,' or sumpin like that? If they don't, they should. They wouldn't lose any money, no body goes back anyway.

Sydney quickly decided she had to use the rest room because she hadn't gone in at least 20 minutes and since the soccer field does not boast the cleanest rest rooms, we went in. I was horrified by what I saw. There sat my unassuming spouse with his hair being butchered by a blind woman. Seriously, she was squinting so badly I could not even see her eyes. AT.ALL. Does Mr. Magoo have a sister? Yes, I think he does, and she cuts hair in Hernando. I wasn't aware you could get a beauty license with the aid of a seeing eye dog. But apparently you can. Unfortunately for Hubs, and Mr. Lego-head, her dog was off that day. I knew there was gonna have to be damage control, so I went next door to the beauty supply and bought a pair of hair trimming scissors while he helped the lady to the register paid his bill.

We still had time to stop and get a snack at the drive through on the way to soccer. I ordered a spicy chicken wrap and a large Dr.Pepper with easy ice 'cause I don't like to pay $1.49 for a large cup of ice and three drinks of Dr.Pepper that are gone before I get to the street. Easy enough right? Now I know the Wendy's is not given to hiring Rhodes scholars for their drive through, they save that for management, but really. Is it that hard to throw a chicken strip in a tortilla and fill a cup? Yeah, I guess it is. As I watched through the window the girl filled my cup to the brim with ice, and jabbed it under the Dr. Pepper spout. She stood there staring at the cup as the Dr. Pepper flowed over the side, for like 2 minutes. Who knows what she was thinking, "would my hair look better purple? When will High School Musical 3 be out on video? Do the Jonas Brothers lipsinc....." who knows. But what she was not thinking about was my cup and the abundance of precious Dr. Pepper that had been spilled down that grate. She slapped a lid on and stuck the dripping cup out the window and said, "here ya go." "Ummmmm, do ya have a napkin available?" I asked. "Oh do you want me to wipe it off?" she said. I replied, "Well, considering the fact there's more DR. Pepper on the cup, than in it, maybe I'll just lick it off." Trixie said, "OK, do you still want the napkins?" My sarcasm was lost. "Yes, please."
Maybe we should slow down, eat at home, and buy a Flowbee .


beckyjomama said...

Oh, girl, I needed that laugh today!!!

Flowbee - Bah ha ha ha h ah a!!!! Too funny.

Oh, and "I'll just lick it"

I think I just tinkled a bit!!!

Tater Mama said...

Flowbee! Oh, Lawzee! You DO crack me up! I love it!