Welcome to my world of run-on sentences and shameless over use of commas. All posts loosely based on true stories as viewed by a sleep deprived drama queen..........

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The Chronicles of Wal-Mart

Okay, so I apologize, I really am not upholding my end of the bargain to be a good blogger. I know I am supposed to blog daily. But to be honest, lately I am doing well if I brush my hair daily. Since school started, and Tracy's dad has been confined to the ICU we are LIVING in our car. Unfortunately I don't have one of those fayancy new phones I can email from (I wouldn't know how to use it if I did).

I usually start my day out by making a list of 10 or 15 things I need to do that day, and feel like I've changed the world if I get two of them done. Today was Wal-Mart day again. I only ran into three families I knew, so I was able to get my shopping/running my mouth time completed in about four hours. Not really, I think it was only about 3 hours and 45 minutes.... I sooo didn't want to go, but I couldn't think of any recipes that only called for three pieces of bread, half a cup of milk, and a questionable slice of cheese.

While I was waiting in line, I began to daze, zone out, you know, the blind focus stare that has no particular object in it's cross hairs. When suddenly I felt as if someone was staring at ME. I looked a bit to the left and there was a young, ahem, lady, glaring at me. I immediately surmised that she thought I was lookin' at her future Baby Daddy when I was blindly looking ahead. He was a prize to be sure, I have always been attracted to men who wear their pants so low they need not adjust them to wipe their buh-hinds. And I believe he must be an excellent provider as he had bought her an assortment of beautiful toe rings with the money he had saved on shampoo. Now, lest you think I am offended by toe rings, I am not. But if you are wearin' more than two on each foot, you might be over accessorizing, just sayin'.

Well, I am off to bed y'all. I promise the return of Moron Monday's next week....

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Happy Saturday

Hey peeps. I'm sorry we haven't talked in a few days. With spending so much time at the hospital and dealing with a little one not feeling so good, it's been taking it's toll. I am happy to say that for the past two days Elly has been doing a lot better though. She has lost several pounds due to not wanting to eat. She told a lady at the hospital today, "her bones were skinny, and they were hangin' out." Maybe it could be a new fad, get your tonsils removed and drop 10 pounds.

Well, as women, there are a few phrases we hear in life that cause our blood to run cold.
1) "We can only stay three weeks".....from your MIL standing at the door. (I first typed "stanking" at the door, this was a typ-o, but take it as you will...

2) "Is there another credit card you would like to try?"

3) "We are out of chocolate"

3) My personal favorite,,,, "could you say a few words?" We just don't like to stand before our peers and speak on a topic. I have gotten a bit less nervous about this over the years, but eloquent I am not. Maybe I should join Marcus in his classes. I say all of this because I had to give a testimony at our Church tonight for our Women's Ministry. I was not nearly as handicapped with nerves as I spent the afternoon thinking I would be, oh the power of prayer.

We managed to get home from the hospital in enough time for us to watch Alabama beat Georgia. ROLL TIDE. Although I must say I was so proud of that GA coach praying with his team after they lost, I could hardly keep from tearing up. It almost made me wish they had tied or something. Every time those AL boys score, my husband comes up out of his seat and takes on like he's really there. And don't let 'em mess up. He yells, and fusses like one of our kids just spilled chocolate ice cream all over the back seat of the car. I don't recall ever watching Rachel Ray and yelling at her for using too much salt, or over mixing the batter. Maybe I'm missing something.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

An ounce of "Pretention"

Hey peeps. This has been one of those days when I just can't seem to get anything done. Mostly due to my foe, The Phone, and a bit to do with my child who intermittently grabs her throat and starts to cry. I called the doctor who said the scabs left from her tonsillectomy are likely beginning to slough off and this can hurt. "Yeah, I imagine so, what kinda drugs ya got for that?" was my educated response. No, not really I hold my southern street slang for y'all.

I ran into an old friend at Wal-Mart, America's gathering place, and she asked me how I was doing. I resisted the urge to tell of my morning that had left me desiring a necklace made entirely of Valium that I could lick at intervals, and instead smiled and said, "Fine, and you?" She was happy to share an unabridged photo album of her brood, 6 in all, and asked me when I was having another. The thought of this left me with a phantom ovary twinge. I explained that my quiver was small, and full.

Now I can't recall the names of all six of her children, but her favorite was obviously her third boy Marcus, because he was all she could talk about. He has excelled in EVERY sport, skipped a grade, and will possibly be the next spokesperson for the Public Library System because he has read so many books. ARGGG!! By the time she was through I remembered why she had lost the status of BFF. I was ready to be movin' on y'all, but not before I suggested she get Marcus started in Swedish lessons and Eloquence classes, lest he be at a disadvantage when he accepts the Nobel Peace Prize. Then I explained that we had to be going because we were reconstructing the Eiffel Tower from Sugar waffers.....I'm sure she thought I was a smart alec, and that may be, but it was not a lie.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Of pets and children

Yesterday I was teaching a science class for Kindergartners through Second graders at a Homeschool co-op. One of the younger girls raised her hand and told me how her family had "found fluffy in the road and they pulled over and put him in the car before he got ran over, and she was so glad to have fluffy at home." "Oh I'm glad you found your kitty," I said. She gave me a look of disgust and said, Fluffy's NOT a cat, he's a turtle!" What was I thinking?
This one ranks right up there with the time several years ago when I was teaching Sunday School and one of my pre-schoolers said their Daddy couldn't come to church that morning because "Mommy put him in time out, she said with an attitude like he had, he could just sit there on the couch, we were goin' to Church." Hmmmmm.

Monday, September 22, 2008

To Protect and To Serve

I love the semi-Fall weather we have been having. It isn't really cool enough to call it Fall all the way. We took the kids to the park Saturday between soccer and visiting hours at the hospital. It's been a long time since we went to the park on a Saturday and I couldn't believe how packed it was. I was tempted to drive right through the parking lot and keep on going, but the kids were so excited. There were several not so nice kids there and I don't think we will be going back on the weekend for a while. The police even arrived at one point and walked through. I thought maybe there was danger a foot in the Hernando metro area until I heard one of them say to the other, "yeah there is a board loose on that slide, and a couple that need to be replaced on the fence over there." I would have loved to hear that conversation...
"911 this is the operator, how may I help you?"

"Umm, yeah, there's a board loose over here on the slide at the Conger Park"

"We'll get someone right out sir"

They are really livin' up to their motto, To Protect and To Serve.

Last night on the way to church I was at an Intersection when a police car was coming from the opposite direction, he turned on his lights and his sirens, and drove through the intersection quickly, then turned them off and went back to regular speed. He turned into the gas station next to me and casually got out and went in the store. Do you think maybe he got a call to fix their toilet?

Sunday, September 21, 2008

I am officially a soccer Mom

Yesterday both Sydney and Elly had games. Sydney played Friday night, and had a blast. She and I both were elevated to new heights in the soccer realm. She scored two goals. After an entire season last year goal-less. This boosted her little spirits to astronomical levels, and her Mama's too. I was screaming and hootin' and going nuts. I heard one of the other parents say to his spouse, "does she know this is Upwards, and they don't keep score?" I don't care. You go baby girl. She didn't score in her game yesterday, but got really close a couple of times. Elly had her first game and did really well as goalie, and actually scored a goal....for the other team. Those pesky rules. At least she kicked it into a goal. She was so excited, we didn't have the heart to tell her that it was not "our goal."
Anyway, here is the photo of the day....Sydney was running in to kick the ball when along came a male player from the other team to do the same thing. He was a bit late, and boy was he in the wrong place at the wrong time. And from the look on his team mates face, he thought it was pretty funny. Could we possibly call this picture "racking up some points"......I couldn't resist y'all.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

" The New Do"

Due to many requests, three anyway, I am posting a picture of the "new do" for a few days. I know y'all are just wantin' to make fun of me..... Anyway, I will delete it after a few days, because I made it my new profile pic. Talk to ya later.

Boob phone

Okay, so today at the hospital there was a somewhat normal, pleasant looking woman carrying on a conversation, when suddenly her chest began ringing. Mid-sentence as though nothing was out of the ordinary, she reached down her neckline and pulled a phone from betwixt her boobage. I SWEAR! If the ringtone had been Island's In The Stream, I would have fallen out of my chair.

Friday, September 19, 2008

What do you guys watch??

I don't know about y'all, but we watch a lot of Animal Planet at our house. Mostly due to the fact there is not a lot of programming on television these days in which people like to keep their clothes on, or disguise their mating habits in any way. But Animial Planet, you gotta lurv the channel that brings you such shows as Animal Cops, and Pet Star. But now, even AP is starting with the "reality" T.V. with shows like Animal Witness, and The Grizzly Man Diaries. I don't want to watch a man living with bears. I was near driven to stark insanity following the life of a Meercat for a year. I know it's scientific, but I get enough of my own research watching the eating habits, fighting habits, and fighting over eating habits, with my own two little homo sapiens. Yesterday while I was on the phone they were fighting it out over the last piece of gum, and my friend said, "do you need to go and break them up?" "Heavens No," I said, "that would taint my research." She thought I was just awful. Her only child does not speak yet, and she is pregnant with the second. She will one day eat crow, oh yes, she will with, or without ketchup. Can I get a witness?

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Is nothing sacred?

Okay, so my sweet friend whom I heart very much just sent me a gross email. It stated that several of the pony tail holders being sold in our fine Country, being manufactured in the country that just stole MANY gold medals with a preschooler on their gymnastics team, are being made from, get this, USED CONDOMS. Talk about recycling. This is just, EWWWW. Especially since I am the queen of holding the pony tail holder between my teeth whilst I brush out their hair......YUCK!!! This is correct according to the Internet police, otherwise known as Snopes.com. So, if you see pony tail holders like the ones below don't buy them, and tell everyone within ear shot why you would NEV-UH purchase them.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Bye, Bye 80's Hair.....maybe not

Well, I did it. I bit the bullet and got a new do. I have had the same hair style for over 20 years and finally I had enough. I read the other day that 80's hair was making a come back, and my hair has been stuck in 1983 well, since 1983. I told my wonderful stylist that I wanted something a little different, easier, younger. She began cutting. I sat, nervously as Sydney watched from across the room and said, "your getting it cut that short!" Using much the same tone as her Daddy used when the anesthesiologist prepared my first epidural, and my comforting husband said, "You're gonna stick THAT in her SPINE!!!" I cringed. At both remarks. Well, the epidural was not that bad, and my hair is not short.

Do y'all remember in Steel Magnolias when Shelby said you "can't mess up M'Lynn's hair, you just tease it and make it look like a brown football helmet"....Well, that is much the same with me, except instead of teasing it, you just curl it. AND IT ALWAYS LOOKS THE SAME. My wonderful hair lady had it lookin' kinda spunky and cute when I left there. I stopped at Wal-Mart to buy $30 worth of hair product. I am SOOO challenged in the beauty market. I don't know the difference between sculpting gel, styling wax, and smoothing compound. It all sounds like something that should be sold in the craft department to me. So, when any of y'all have a minute I need someone to take me shopping for some hair gunk,,,and a new bra, which I have yet to get. And by the way, my 19 year old niece read that and said "You mean you have never been fitted for a bra?" I am so sheltered....

Your child might be watching too much T.V. if....

...you're shopping on the cereal isle, and she says, "look Mom, this is the new specially marked box." I told y'all we had been watching a lot since the surgery...did I lie? Of course this is the same child who at the age of 5 handed me a shred of paper with a 1-800 number on it, and said, "here, you need to order one of these." It was the number for that magical purse in which nothing gets lost because each item therein has it's own compartment. And she would be right, because I can't EVER find ANYTHING in my purse. Of course, I am sure this requires the owner of said purse to actually put the items where they go in order for them to be easily located. This disqualifies me. Instead of having just one big opening to dig for all of my junk in, I would have to go through each and every compartment to find what I needed. I can envision the line of people cursing at me in Wal-Mart while they wait as I go through each compartment looking for my wallet. NO.THANKS.

Rembember when you were young and you used to look for things to put in your purse. You know, a pack of gum with one stick left, one of your mom's old make-up compacts. Maybe a pen and a little notebook, a tube of chapstick, just anything to make it look like you actually had something in there. Now if my purse falls over it's like cleaning out the junk drawer at my Mother's house, the mob may be hidin' someone in that thing.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Second Edition of Moron Monday

FORT WORTH, Texas - Police say a 20-year-old woman faces an aggravated assault charge after she bit her boyfriend, broke a picture frame across his face and swung at him with a sword during an argument about him not doing the dishes....

..what do ya think she would've done if he left the seat up?

Praise you LORD!!

My FIL prayed and accepted Jesus as his Savior last night(he's struggling with lung cancer). I just had to put that into blogosphere because the way it happened it sooo awesome. In hindsight you can see how God's hand worked to control the events of the day. He is awesome!! As I was getting in my car after hearing the good news the song "Mighty to Save" was on the radio....I'm just sayin' not only is God good, He's sweet too!!

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Disney channel anyone?

I think I have seen every cartoon Tom and Jerry ever starred in. I just love that cute little mouse. Did you know he's a little Christian mouse, he always prays just before Tom catches up to him. And he never eats a bite at his little match box dinette without offering thanks first. His mousie mama would be so proud.

As I have sat cuddled up in the recliner with Elly for almost three days straight, I am on cartoon overload. I have just one question. When did Disney channel morph into MTV? Tonight we watched a movie on said channel, and every three minutes we had to watch five minutes worth of music videos with teens/tweens dressed to look like 20 somethings 'hangin at da club.' I'm thinkin' Donald Duck would be all over Huey, Dewy, and Louie if they pulled some of this stuff.

Did you all like the picture of Elly at the hospital? She has been such a good patient y'all. I wanted to bring my camera to take lots of pictures, but I forgot it, so I took this one with my phone. It's just as well that I forgot it, after the looks I got at the dentist's office when the girls got their teeth cleaned for the first time. Apparently every Momma does not ask the hygienist to pose with her instruments in mid-air because she forgot to turn the flash on. I guess that's just one more place where we will be known as "THAT family."

Friday, September 12, 2008

Coming up for Air

This has the potential to be long, because I haven't had a meaningful conversation with y'all in 3 or 4 months days. Grab a Popsicle and sit back, 'cause I need to talk....

Have y'all ever had a week where it seems like from Monday to Friday took about 4 months? That's about the closest way I can describe this week. This was a stressful week to say the least. Thank you all for your prayers, calls, cards, and thoughts this week.

Elly did better than we ever expected yesterday. When they came around the corner wheeling her bed from the operating room she was sitting up in the bed with her legs crossed looking around. She saw me waiting in the hall and said, "There you are." She wanted to know where the Popsicles were and why her voice didn't sound like Mickey Mouse like I said it would.....I don't know why I was surprised. She is such a little spit fire. She always has been. They couldn't believe how well she was talking. Today she has digressed a little, but that is to be expected.

To add to the stress of the week, Tuesday afternoon I went to Wal-Mart to buy all the soft carbs and soups for Elly I could think of, and CHOCOLATE for me, for her recovery period. As I was pushing the cart down the last isle, Syd told me her throat hurt. I reached over casually to touch her forhead, you know, just in case. WHAT? You guessed it, burning up. I called the doctor's office, knowing I couldn't take her the next day, what with Elly's surgery and all. It was 3:39, the nurse said if I could be there at 4:00 they could take her.....I ran to the front of the store to tell the nice greeter lady I had to leave to run my child to the doctor and there was ice cream and stuff in the cart, but I didn't have time to put it all back. Of course she was wondering what emergency had befallen us, that I had to rush out the door like that. "Is her arm broken? Has she suddenly broken out in a mad rash? Convulsions?" "No, no, she just has fever and a sore throat," I said. The greeter lady looked really puzzled, but agreed to find someone to put everything up. I'm sure she thinks I'm a total idiot, but I didn't have time to explain the conundrum that is my life on a daily basis,(so it seems). I started out the door and realized Elly was not behind me...where was she, you ask....in the ice machine. You know the one by the front door that houses the big bags of ice. I turned, and all I see sticking out the doors are her little feet with flip flops hangin' off....."COME ON, WE HAVE GOT TO BE AT THE DOCTOR'S IN 16 MINUTES."

Hubs met me at the doctor's office. We grabbed a bite to eat and then he took the prescriptions to the pharmacy and went by the hospital to visit his Dad. I took the girls and went BACK to Wal-Mart to re-shop for all the things I had already shopped for earlier in the day. I soooo hoped it would not be the same greeter at the door. It was. I walked by her quickly and looked back to see her pointing in our direction while talking to her co-worker. I don't read lips, but I'm sure she said something about "there goes THAT family"... Why didn't I go in the other door?

We made it home just minutes before my big sis and niece got here to help us. I don't think we could have made it without them. We were not looking forward to dragging Syd to the hospital at 5:30 a.m. if we didn't have to. Teresa, my sister, is great with the kiddos. She has already raised her three and I am so glad, 'cause that way she can help me with mine.

I have great respect for that woman, not only is she a barrel of ENTERTAINMENT for the kids, but I once saw her bring my 6 foot 5 inch tall nephew to his knees with just two fingers. She's tiny. I got all the big genes, and big jeans, you know what I'm sayin. We were in the mall shopping when my nephew regretfully said something, umm, er, regretful. She shot him a look that said 'the only reason you're still conscience is because I can't carry you,' and then she reached her little hand up and grabbed his ear, down he came. I try not to make her mad if I can keep from it.

That brings us up to date. Mostly, anyway.

Elly is ready for her Momma to come hold her and watch Tom and Jerry, so off I go. Talk later.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Our Spunky Little Patient

Our Spunky little patient did such a good job today. She was so brave. Hats off to the wonderful Doctors and Nurses that "make surgery fun" at Lebonheur.

I will post more tomorrow, when I have had more than 2 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period....I pray I will that is, oh Lordy, do I pray.


It's been a bad week at the Patterson house. Lost a good friend two days ago. Sweet woman, homeschooling mom of 5. Six lives changed forever in one afternoon. Please keep the Jones family in your prayers. Tracy's Dad is back in hospital. Elly's tonsils come out in two hours. Please lift us up, paint it on thick y'all. Be back soon, I promise.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Blog Fodder

Every time anything happens around our house now, the kids ask "are you gonna put that on your blog?" Even my spouse has come to realize that his every comment, every move, may be blog fodder. It's actually keeping him in line a bit. Hey, we all need accountability right?

The Cat fairy was at our house this weekend. Did you know about her? She's the no good, no pet fixin', responsibility shirking, looser fairy that leaves kittens at the home of people that appear to have a heart. This is our fourth visit from some such fairy in 5 years, and this time she left three kittens! I am then forced to feed these helpless creatures, as I can NOT, no I can not, let them be hungry. I am from the South, if you come to my home I will feed you, human or kitten.

Sydney and Elly would sooo love to be cat people. But myself, not so much. Hubby's eyes swell up like the ones on the Garfield balloon at the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade when he gets too close to a cat. You know the look, kinda like your eyes are external appendages. So, I spent the better part of my day calling every shelter within a 50 mile radius trying to find a home for the pitiful things. That, and cleaning kitten poop off my front porch. Yay me....

I would appreciate it if both of you that read this blog would keep Tracy's dad in your prayers. He has been battling lung cancer. He just found out a couple of months back, and it has been a rough road. He has an appointment in the morning for some issues he was having today. Please pray all goes well according to God's plan. I know ya will, Love y'all.

Post number 3# today

I just posted this on someone else's blog as a comment, but I think it can stand alone as a post. Sometime's bloggin' is just like talking to yourself out loud.

My girls gymnastics coach always tells them to keep their eyes on the end of the beam and they won't fall off. But if they keep looking all around them, or down at their own unsteady feet, then they get shaken. We have to keep our eyes on Jesus all the time, or we get shaken, and distracted by all that is going on around us. Maybe good things, maybe not, but distracting none the less. Phil 3:12 and 3:14

Moron Mondays, and second post of the day

Today is my first edition of Moron Mondays, where I will share the moronic events I find in the news......

Look!! It's Britany Spears fully clothed, now there's a sight more rare than sasquatch. If only her babies made her as proud as those little trophies.


BUENOS AIRES (Reuters) - Furious rail commuters in Argentina set fire to a train on Thursday in anger over delays during the morning rush hour. Bet that'll get it movin' faster. What do y'all think??

Fall is in the air....

...somewhere. But not here. No folks not in Missipi. It is supposed to be near 90 most of the week. We had that one promise of Fall on Friday when it was a bone chilling 68 degrees. All the ladies on my street came running outside with their cutsie fall arrangments, garlands for their mailboxes, and wreaths with mums and scarecrows on them, pumpkins and gourds. All of them except for me, cause you know, I'm a rebel like that. Oh the pressure. What would Martha Stewart do?

Today is a big day for the girls. They started a new co-op class where they will take Art classes, a class on famous American Heros, and a Science class. It's only on Mondays. They told me they are going to "Monday School", get it? Like Sunday School....oh, maybe it's just me.... They were so excited. I don't know where she heard the word, but Sydney asked me the other day what a nerd was. I told her it was the kid who grows up to make the most money....really, that's the way it turned out where I went to school.

We are counting down the days until Thursday when Elly gets her tonsils out. She is SOOO excited about this. She asked today "when I wake up will it me tomorrow and then today won't be today anymore, and I'll be closer to the day I get my tonsils out?" Ummmm, er, yeah. I think. It's possible you may have just completed Einstein’s unfinished revolution theory.....

It's time to take wake up the girls and get the excited kids to their class. Then I guess I'm off to Wal-Mart to get some 'Fall decorations'. Don't tell Martha I didn't make 'em myself....

Friday, September 5, 2008

Big weekend

My precious girl is getting Baptised this weekend. I am so excited. We sat down together today for her to write out her testimony to give to the Pastor on Sunday. As she wrote the words about how she prayed and asked Jesus into her heart I couldn't help but cry y'all. She was young, almost five, and I just couldn't imagine her being old enough to make that kind of decision. Every time she would say she wanted to pray and ask Jesus into her heart, I would lead her in a prayer along the lines, of "Thank you Father for this good work you've started in Sydney, please continue to guide her paths...etc." But this time she said "I don't want that! I want Jesus in my heart NOW, NOW, NOW!! We were driving down the road. I looked up in the rear view mirror and her little eyes were closed and she was just a prayin' up a storm. She did it without me. I didn't have the faith that she could believe. And she did it without me. When we got home, I asked her if she wanted to pray together, and she said she already had, but she would do it again. It made me feel better. But I asked her today if she remembered us praying together and she said no. She remembers, word for word what was said in the car though, when she really did it, for the first time. Without me. I kept thinking there was no way she could understand propitiation, and atonement. No way could she be ready. But neither did I understand all that when I got saved. All that stuff came later. We are like babes at first. The Holy Spirit comes in and does His job, and then as we obey, we learn and begin to understand these things. What we need to be saved is to have a child like faith in JESUS. We've done a study on Baptism and obedience to the Lord, and she wants to be baptised. No way is she gonna do that without me. I'm gonna be right there, on the front row, the one with the camera and a box of Kleenex. This last seven years have flown by, I guess the next time she'll be the center of attention at Church she'll be walking down the isle for a different reason. And again, I'll be the one on the front row with a camera and a box of Kleenex.

Good eatin'

There's a reason cinnamon starts with cin people. And it's not all his fault, he has some great qualities, he just fell in with the wrong crowd when he started hangin' out with brown shuguh all the time. OOOHH.My.Goodness y'all, I am eatin' THE BEST Streusel I've ever madeKroger ever sold. It is melt in your mouth yummy. We've been eating a lot healthier around here lately, but my baby daddy brought these home last night and they are da bomb!

Yesterday at soccer practice a lady asked me what do you do in your homeschool? Well, yesterday we........

...taped our noses to our foreheads. It was fun. Elly had too much pride to allow me to take her picture with her "nose holes open", this IS a quote. Syd and I don't mind, we have no pride.

I promise we really do study. I know I speak and type 'Southern Street', and I'll admit to a shameful over use of commas, and run on sentences. However, I try my best to make learning fun, and find the way each of them learns best and focus on that. It's not an easy job fo sho, but I feel it is what God has called me to do, and I love it.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

I am a Proud Grandmother

This is my sweet child Elly, and my precious grand daughter Lucy, a.k.a. Baby Alive.
Aren't they sweet? I'm worried about that baby though, her momma had better get her to the doctor soon, everything she eats goes straight through her.

Elly went back to the doctor herself yesterday. And yes peeps, the tonsils are soon to be history. She will have them removed next Thursday. We were at the doctor yesterday for a 1:30 appointment. Oh how I wish he could have performed the surgery at 1:45, because this poor child has talked non-stop tonsil since then. She says, "I'm no-vus" to which I reply by calming her with promises of ice cream, Popsicles, and other soft carbs that she loves so dearly. My little child who rarely talks to strangers turned into Chatty Talkerson at Wal-mart telling every one she met that she would be at the "Kid's Hospital" (not sure where that hospital is) getting her tonsils removed next week, did they know? That has always been her tag line. Since the age of 2 1/2 she would state a fact, and then follow it up with, "di-ja know?"

She asked me this morning if getting her tonsils out was gonna make her smarter? Ummm, I don't think so. I had mine out at 12, and I don't recall any academic achievements flowing forth. In fact, my sister reminded me last night that I walked around with my tongue hanging out with drool dripping off for about two weeks. While the surgery will not make her smarter, she's smart enough already, let's hope it doesn't reduce her to Saint Bernard like symptoms either.

Please keep her in your prayers, she would like that. Di-ja know?

Can I hear my own words???

I don't know about you, but I can NOT stand for my kids to yell at me from the other room. I can remember being a kid and my own mother telling me, "if you want to talk to me, come into the room where I am."

The other day I was in my laundry room trying to wash/dry and fold....multi-tasking at it's best I'll tell ya. Miss Syd was in the the living room yelling to me about Elly hitting the dog, or something like that, I'm not really sure, she could have been saying she was eating a frog for all I know. The point is, I couldn't hear her. About the only thing I can hear from across the house is, "I'MMM DONE! A phrase all mother's of preschoolers listen for intently.

I beckoned Sydney to come to me in my loudest, sweet voice. I said, "Listen, I can't hear you when you are calling to me from all the way across the house. There are too many walls between us. I can't hear you, and you for sure aren't gonna be able to hear me. You might hear just part of what I'm sayin' and do the wrong thing, or might not even hear me at all. Either way, it's not good."........Wait a minute, what was that God? Did you tell me to stop and think about what I just said to my seven year old?

I am so guilty of having walls between My Savior and myself. There's the wall of sin, wall of shame, wall of fear, wall of doubt,,the list goes on. All of these walls make it hard to talk to Him, and expect Him to hear, and they certainly keep me from hearing Him. I've got to get all of that stuff out of the way, so we can communicate. Prayer is such a wonderful thing, if we confess our fears to Him, the fear wall comes down (psalm 63:7-8), confess our shame and sense of inadequacy, the wall comes down (Romans 8:15), confess our doubts, and the wall comes down(Luke 17:5), confess our sins, and the wall comes down(1John 1:9). Before we know it, we are right there. Open, honest, and right there in His presence. Where He is listening, and hearing, and speaking. And we can hear Him. What a great lesson/reminder the Lord gave me over a pile of colors. Thank you Jesus, you are so faithful.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

It's a good thing..........not

Y'all know I love to scrapbook. It's a passion of mine, that has taken a back seat to blogging, cause well, you guys don't make as big a mess, or cost anything....Back to my hobbies, I noticed this evening that Martha Stewart was gonna be scrapbooking and making cards on her show. So I tuned in. That woman is SICK. She made a card from 'handmade paper' with layers of stamping, heat embossing, paper stitching, and distressed ink. Was it pretty? Heck yeah, it was. She had it more than half way done when the show came on. I bet it took 18 hours to make it. That and about $82 worth of supplies. I like to make cards, but not like that. Does she know that most normal people THROW AWAY cards after a week or two? If I ever make one of y'all a card like that, I expect to see it framed and hangin' above your fire place when I visit. And if one of you ever has the desire to make me a card like that, save yourself the time, and send the $82 bucks my way. Could you imagine having to spend much time with that lady? Just the way she so prominently pronounces her T's gives me the creeps. "Ladies, Today we are going To be making a card ouT of hand made paper thaT I prepared this morning, and some flowers thaT I harvesTed from my wild flower garden thaT I dried especially for this pro-jecT. Let's go over here to the crafT table thaT I made this afTernoon from old wood I found in the barn. iT's a good thing,,,,,," I know tomorrow is a church night and all, but if you've got Tivo she's makin laminated place mats for your dogs and cats. ......Can't you buy a laminated place mat at Wal-Mart for like fifteen cents? okay, not really, but less than a dollar I'm sure. I'm gonna watch anyway, cause I want to see how she makes her own laminating machine.

How To put a signature on your posts

I'm not really patient enough to type out 'how to' instructions at this time, but I promise it's not hard, or it wouldn't be on my blog. I used Photoshop to make it, then uploaded it to Photobucket and typed the HTML code into the template of my blog. If you use Wordpress, I believe there is an easier way, but alas, I am not familiar with that program. If you don't have photoshop, leave me a comment with the name you want on your blog and I will make a signature for you and email to you the code and instructions to install it into your blog. It may take me a few days, we started school today so both of my brain cells are hooked on phonics. I will however, get to it.

Monday, September 1, 2008

I am recovering.....

Happy Labor Day Peeps!! Thank you, Lord for holding back Gustav and calming him down a good bit.
I hope all of you are having a good long weekend. I, myself am still recovering. We managed to get out to the lake Saturday for one last boat trip for the summer. Most of us had a good time. Elly, as usual slept for most of the time. Just sumpin about being on a boat makes that child go to sleep. And Tracy and Sydney both needed to be spanked for how bad they were. You see, some people send love notes, some buy flowers or candy, to let you know how much they love you, some are mushy, and cuddly, my husband's love language is practical joking, gettin' me spoiled up, that boy is just BADDDDDD, and Sydney is following closely in his footsteps. I am sooooo out numbered here. So, as I mentioned before, I am recovering....from heart failure, thanks to Pranksta #1 (a.), and Pranksta #2 (b.).

a. Pranksta 1

b. Pranksta 2

The Victim

Sleeping Beauty

Sydney loves to tube. She can get on that thing and ride all day long. I am usually right at the back of the boat watching and snapping pics, 'cause, as you know, we need 436 pictures of the same thing. Well, Elly was falling asleep, and I was trying to cover her with a damp towel to keep the sun from scorching her little baby soft skin. So for one minute I looked away, one minute mind you, and that's all it took for them to concoct their plan..... I turn back to my post watching Sydney, what do I see?? an empty tube. No one in it. My heart stops, I gasp in enough air to shout, "where is she? Where's Sydney?" Tracy turns around so fast I think his head might snap off, the look of fear on his face was almost more than I could process. He quickly begins to scan the water with his beady little eyes, I'm in shear panic mode now. I said all of the following in 12.6 seconds without stopping to breathe: "My baby, where is my baby, I only looked away for a second and she was gone, and I don't even see her little head anywhere in the water, and here comes a big boat and what if it hits her out there, because if I can't see her then neither can he, where is she and why isn't she yelling for us? Why are you laughing? What could you possibly find funny at a time like this?"............AND HE YELLS FOR SYDNEY TO RAISE UP!!! She was layin' down in the bottom of the tube! I was ready to cry y'all. I was BESIDE.MYSELF. If y'all see him in the next few days, ask him how he got those bruises on his arms, head, and shoulders. Meaness, pure meaness. Sydney was howling with laughter. Between the two of 'em it was a regular snort fest.
I hope to be completely recovered by mid-week, y'all can send flowers or candy, but if your love language is practical joking, don't share the love, just sayin'.

Tracy says to tell y'all he rests his case on where Sydney gets her drama queening...........