Welcome to my world of run-on sentences and shameless over use of commas. All posts loosely based on true stories as viewed by a sleep deprived drama queen..........

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Shitzu surprise...

I love to feed my inferiority complex by viewing home decor magazines and cooking periodicals. Southern Accents, Southern Living (I think I have all of their hardback Christmas books) and Traditional Home are some of my faves. After typing that list, I realize it's no wonder I have a facial tick. Over Thanksgiving weekend I took time to sit down and look at all the magazines and sales ads I had not had time to look at in a while. I don't know what snack you're planning to bring to your office Christmas party, but Sam's would like for you to bring this:


Pomeranian Poo, Shitzu Surprise, Terrier Turds.....I mean really Sam's, does this look appetizing to you?



And Martha wants you to do this....

No, kids we won't be able to go to see Santa this year, because I'll be too busy TYING RIBBONS AROUND EACH INDIVIDUAL PIECE OF FUDGE! What?? Who has time for this? That's one way to ration the fudge, 'cause who in the heck is gonna mess around all night trying to get the ribbon off. I'd just pop the whole thing in my mouth and spit the ribbon out when I was done. When it comes to chocolate, back away slowly, 'cause I'm not playin'. I really don't think I would be invited to a second party at Martha's house.

But this was the tackiest thing I believe I found, taking hand made gifts to a new level, home made cuff links.....

Made from Legos...... and this was not a craft for kids either.....

I feel a little bit better about my menu, unadorned fudge, and store bought gifts. Sleep tight.

4 comments:

Jamie said...

Ribbons on individual pieces of fudge? Seriously? How... um... obsessive-compulsive.

That either says to the recipient, "I love you enough to make fudge for you and spend my valuable time making it look pretty," or "You need to go on a diet. No, really. Here, have a piece of fudge -- but only one, and only if you can get the darn ribbon off first."

The Farmer Files said...

Honestly, I am coveting those cute fudge squares!

Melanie said...

Ok, you kill me. That's hysterical.

Pic 1: before I even read what you wrote, I thought "ohmygosh, poop on a plate."

Pic 2: So don't have time to do that, but it does look pretty. And you..."pop it in my mouth and spit out the ribbon" - you're a hoot!

Pic 3: Looks like a toy plane crashed into a lego.

Great post. You're about to get a bunch of visitors 'cause I'm emailing the link to some of my non-blogger buddies. This is just gonna crack people up.

Later, gator.
Mel

Tater Mama said...

So when people walk their dogs, they can carry those little bags and save the, er, you know...treasures to make recipe #1. Ewwwwwwwww!

You are too funny, Calista!