After three rounds of I Spy, by the way, there is only so much to spy in a small examining room, and almost EVERYTHING is tan, grey, or white, and at least 4 rounds of 'the rhyming game' I was almost OVER it. If it had not been for the fireball of pain I have had in my abdomen for two days, I would have given up and gone home.
You may have noticed my absence for the last couple of days, or not. Anyway, I have been in pain, and not up to much. I am currently amped up anti-inflammatory, Mt. Dew, and chocolate...let the healing begin. I really thought I probably had something like diverticulitis or some such ailment of the intestine because of the pain and lack of any other symptoms. After the nurse read my complaint she requested a urine sample. Yay me. Off I headed to the rest room, Elly in tow. For those of you asking yourself why I didn't leave her in the room with Sydney, re-read paragraph one. Elly thought the whole experience of leaving your pee in a little cubby whole in the wall was extraordinary. "Eww, you're gonna pee-pee in that cup? Why you gonna put it in that little door on the wall, that's gross, what are they gonna do with your pee-pee?" She asked if 'real' people live behind the door, or if they were 'little people?'" Umm.. I'm guessin' too many Keebler Elves commercials. I may not ever get her to eat Fudge Striped cookies again.
When the doctor FINALLY made it
Well, in the comments on my last post, Tater Mama you were dead on. I can not tell you how many men I counted harvesting nose goblins as I waited through the same red light for NINE minutes. Southaven really should consider a subway.
And Joann, (I would prop her here if she had a blog, which she doesn't, but she really should, 'cause she needs to get a hobby. Her ENTIRE yard is covered in cobwebs, ghouls, and home made tombstones....for nursery rhyme characters...HOBBY NEEDED..) She is my hair cutting queen. She wanted me to share with you why we laughed AT ME, until we cried Friday after my cardio visit when she cut my hair. Long story short, the doctor examined my breast area because of the pain in my chest wall. I was following my rule of no eye contact/speaking while he was 'performing his task'. I broke my own rule and asked a question, he looked me DEAD in the eye and responded, UGHHH, THEN proceeded to tell me I had beautiful eyes. I wanted to say, "could we talk about my eyes when your hands aren't on my boobs," but what actually came out was...."thank you, you have pretty eyes too???" WHAT?? Who is this person that speaks with my mouth??! It's a good thing they have chocolate there, else I don't think I could EVUH go back! Joann, your tombstones really were cute!
4 comments:
That last part was pretty funny. I hate it when my brain disconnects from my mouth when I get flustered.
Hope you feel better!
You know, men's hands are NEVER where they're supposed to be....in their noses, lodged in the waistband of their pants (what's with THAT?), on patients' boobs......
Hope to hear that all is well. And I DID notice your absence, as yours is one of the first blogs I read.
I just put all my faves on Google Reader. Are you impressed? Or are you sad because I'm the last to know about that thing, too?! :)
Maybe the doctor had a disconnect first?!? Maybe he didn't know what came out of his mouth either when he complimented your eyes! LOL!
You deserve an award for going to a doctor's appointment with kids in tow. (I often wish I didn't even have to bring the kids along to their own appointments with the pediatrician. Toddlers treat the examining room exactly like an examining room. Ugh.) And may I just add my congratulations, re: not getting any urine on your hands? ;) Heh.
As for your doctor's comment, yeah, that would be a little awkward. Hard to make a witty comeback when you are struggling just to keep your dignity intact. (Paper gowns, for example, were NOT designed to make one feel comfortable and easy -- perhaps the person who started that trend was related to your doctor.)
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