Welcome to my world of run-on sentences and shameless over use of commas. All posts loosely based on true stories as viewed by a sleep deprived drama queen..........

Friday, October 10, 2008

Would you like fiber with that?

Hello peeps. I was wondering if any of you know of a diet where I can actually eat food, and still loose weight. I went to the closet today and attempted to try on some clothes from the last Fall season, and thus started my seasonal crusade to "loose a few pounds." I go on this crusade at the beginning of each new season when I try on clothes from the the year before and they are too tight. This has been a seasonal crusade for me for as long as I can remember.

I think they just kind of draw up sitting in the closet during their off season. Much like the Dodgers or the Braves they need some training to reach their normal capabilities. I remember once asking my mother if she would wear a pair of my jeans around the house for a bit while I got ready for school. They had been in the closet all summer and I wanted her to stretch them out for me. "It's okay if you can't button them, just pull them up as high as you can and walk around," I said. I am sure she was flattered.

I thought I would pick up a few foods lower in fat than my norm. That doesn't take much. Do they make diet M&Ms? Low Fat Movie Theater Butter popcorn? I Didn't think so. I bought yogurt and cottage cheese instead.

They have a new kind of yogurt in the store. It has like 5 grams of fiber in it. Ever since they came out with that so called tasteless fiber that you can mix in liquid, the fiber Nazis have come out of the woodwork. It's everywhere. I bought some lemonade the other day and the label boasted 3 grams of fiber. Where will they put it next, aspirin? Fight headaches and irregularity in just one pill. Jamie Lee Curtis would be proud. I think it's a terrorist plot. They'll fill us full of fiber and take over the country while we're all locked in the bathroom.

Well, I'm off to do my Bible Study homework. I almost shortened that to BS homework. That would not have been good, no girls, it would not. Anyway, I have to get it done in a timely manner this week. Somehow it just doesn't soak in well when you stay up all night to do all 5 days worth the night before you go. I can't imagine why.


Tater Mama said...

Pretty soon we'll be hearing that you're taking your laptop into the bathroom and writing from there, girl! Easy on the fiber, sister!

Your posts never disappoint!

I've got something for you over at my site today. Just a little happy.

The Robertsons said...

I can't believe you really asked your mom to wear your jeans for you. Too funny:)

calista said...

Yep, I really did. At least she could fit into mine. I don't think I'll be able to say that for my kids.....