Welcome to my world of run-on sentences and shameless over use of commas. All posts loosely based on true stories as viewed by a sleep deprived drama queen..........

Sunday, October 12, 2008

What language do you speak?

I overheard some friends talkin' tonight about how they wanted to learn to speak Arabic. WOW! That's impressive. I don't think it's for me. I've never been good with the whole phonetic sound of "hack a loogie" at the end of each word. No friends, my goals are much less lofty. I would just like for someone to tutor me in the fine art of compass-speak, and THEN in the fine art of man-speak. So my man can you know, actually hear, understand, and retain, THE WORDS THAT ARE COMIN’ OUTTA MY MOUTH!! At least once a day we seem to have the "we've already talked about this," "No we haven't," conversation. After listening to what MANY of my friends have to say, I don't think it's isolated my my spouse. I believe the entire race of males suffer from this malady. I may be wrong. If your man hears, understands, and can recall everything you tell him, or even most of what you tell him, then my friend you may have the illusive Manicorn. Much more rare even than his equally mythical friend, the unicorn.

I'm sure they feel the same way about us. Mine has every right to. I can hear him, and understand him, I just can't remember what he said by the time he finishes the sentence.

In closing I will leave a note in Arabic, in case either of the bi-lingual hopefuls are reading along: "ḥawwāmtī mumtilah biānqalaysūn" Translation: "My hovercraft is full of eels." Now go, practice! Don't forget the hacking sound.

5 comments:

Ginny said...

Thanks for my daily dose of laughter; I'm with you...if I could just master "man-speak", I'd be doing good!!! (P.S. How did you post that Kreativ blogger award? I couldn't figure out how to get mine and post it...I ride the blogging short bus!!!)

The Kings Daughter said...

OK, this was very good to pull up and read at the end of my 1st day back at school (with my 28-2 absent) first graders today.
And believe me the left/right side of the brain thing is real. Our sweet hubbies do not comprehend the majority of things we say....they are usually asleep after the first sentence...."Can I get a witness!!!" Ha-ha

All Rileyed Up said...

I love this word, manicorn. I'm going to definitely add that to my vocabulary :)

calista said...

The manicorn has many capablities not possessed by the common "man" such as the ability to start the dishwasher, and refold the hand towel.

Kim Sue said...

cracking me up...what about finding things in the house that have been kept in the same place the entire 8 years you have lived in this house - "Sweetie, where is an extra roll of papertowels?"